First, I've noticed that Western parents are extremely anxious about their children's self-esteem. They worry about how their children will feel if they fail at something, and they constantly try to reassure their children about how good they are notwithstanding a mediocre performance on a test or at a recital. In other words, Western parents are concerned about their children's psyches. Chinese parents aren't. They assume strength, not fragility, and as a result they behave very differently.
This excerpt closely reminds me of the parenting style that I have been brought up with. My mom had raised me. My mom has raised me to be strong and in some ways, insensitive. In my house if you don’t have a thick skin you will begin to feel extremely insecure and saddened. My mom and I are two people who are very brash and we speak our minds and sometimes we can say hurtful things. People don’t realize that it has a lot to do with the way that she raised me, she raised me in order to not car what others say to me and to make the assumption that others feel the same.
When I fail at something my mom expects me to bounce right back from it, and I know that it has made me a better and more resilient person in the end. In my family, tough love is a normalcy, and I’m going to do the same with my children. Tough love is an effective way to raise strong children who will be able to handle the realities of the world and to know that people will not always sugar-coat things for you. If children are brought up in an environment where they are given tough love they are better able to respond to the real world.
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